Lower Wandsworth's own Suzzanne Wilde was likely feeling pretty flowery this past weekend when she won the Queensberry memorial poetry competition for her poem "Pica". Suzzanne, (or Snoozy, as her friends call her), competed against peers from accross the tri-state area school districts to compose a two stanza poem for a chance to win a seven dollar nutribank gift certificate and a Snowflake's Chance Medical Center waiting room raffle ticket. The winning poem will be included in Family Forage's new "Gristlewhips" marketing campaign. Eight year old Snoozy said of winning the top prize "I'm going to give the raffle ticket to my mom". Snoozy's mother Patricia has stage four liver cancer and due to a clerical error was not able to benefit from last year's Family Forage class action lawsuit settlement. When told the raffle ticket was non-transferable the Snooze responded with a brevity fitting the newly minted laureate and simply said "oh."
Snoozy two shoes' opponents mostly took their respective losses in stride. "I don't really get it", said one unlucky runner up,"there was a lot of words [in Suzzanne's poem], and I guess the judges just liked that sort of thing." Sebastian Collar, the thirteen year old son of senator James Collar, however had a slightly different take. "I spent the better part of two hours on my submission, and I'm a fantastic writer to begin with." When asked if he thought his poem "mmm grhistle" should have won, Sebastian told the Daily Report his uncle owned a thirty-seven percent stake in SCMC so he wasn't particularly concerned about the prize, but said "Let's just say I'm not surprized the winning entry was written by a girl, 'cause you know.." You will be able to hear Wilde's poem this summer when the Gristlewhips campaign launches nationwide in July. Sadly Patricia Wilde is not expected survive mid June.